Hey Arnav!
Happy 14th Birthday! I can’t believe I am writing this to you instead of saying this in person along with a big hug. But such is life!
What is even more unbelievable is that my (self-produced) little ball of fluff is now a strapping young lad of 14, who surpassed my height quite a few years ago and is now about to surpass his dad’s. I don’t know whether to laugh or cringe every time you call me ‘shorty’! But the heart does swell with love each time!
I know you keep trying to make me admit that you are the most loved amongst your brothers – but you also know that’s not true!! But yes, a first born, always has a special place, because you are the one with whom, we started our journey of parenthood 😊 You are the first one to grow inside me, the first one I cradled and nurtured.
You know what I like best about you? You have always been a content child – at peace with yourself. Never a tantrum from you, never crossing a line. You have always adjusted so well to any situation – a travelling mom, moving multiple schools and countries and always in a happy place. I know it must not have been easy, but you did it and without any complaints.
I never realized when you became my companion. Thank you for deciding to move in with me when I first moved to Almaty! I know in the two years prior, I had become very involved with the twins, so when we lived together in Almaty, I got a chance to bond with you again. I think I have some of my happiest memories from those days. Weekend outings, weekend grocery shopping, making Lego together, TV binging. Moving from 7+ shows to all kinds of stuff!!!
And you know, I was deeply touched when you told me last December that you chose to move, because you wanted to spend more time with me. I suppose it shouldn’t have been so surprising, but still, to hear you say it, it meant a lot. Thank you.
And it has been such a joy to see you growing up – we observed with delight when you started taking interest in the piles of books we had bought for you, how you turned into a voracious reader soon after and how now, a lot of what you read or say, is beyond our understanding! My ‘professional history nerd’, I feel so proud when you say, “wait mumma I will just tell you the entire history of the middle east region” or when the Russian war on Ukraine began (you were 12 then), you were the one who explained the dynamics from years ago. Your mature understanding of history and the present world conflicts astounds me!
I don’t know how much credit your dad and I can take (though we would love to), but I think it is mostly you. I am also amazed at how little you want. Like I said above – content. Cut to recent conversations:
You: “I broke my slippers”
Dad: “Buy new ones”
You: “I will try to fix them”
x-x-x-x
You: “I am going out to meet my friends”
Mum: “okay, take this money”
You: “This is too much, I don’t need it”
And now you are away from us. A hard decision, but you adapted so beautifully. We have told you so, so many times, how much we miss you, and am saying it once more. Have looked through pictures of all your previous birthday parties. Your dad used to laugh at me for my obsession with your theme parties. But I think we all enjoyed them. Including your dad 😊
Well, have said lots of good things and now time for a little lecture. The first year of your teens has gone by, and you are also gearing up for grade ten. It is difficult for us, not being there to make sure that you are studying well and doing your best – it is difficult not be to able to keep an eye!! But for you, it is also an opportunity for immense learning – self management. Because ultimately, we all need to learn how to manage ourselves, how to ensure that we are doing the best we can. I think it is better that you don’t have parents to nag you, but your responsibility is greater.
You have immense potential – a great brain, analytical mind and you are emotionally strong. You just need to learn how to harness this potential now. This year will be very important for you, when you start getting a sense of what you want to do with your life. Our job as parents is to ensure that you have all the tools you will need to navigate life – but ultimately you will be sailing your own ship.
We will be behind you. Always. Treat us as your sounding board, the shoulder to cry on, someone to vent to, someone to hug. (by the way, I loved the bear hug you gave me when you came to Almaty for vacation!)
Whatever age you are – 14, 21, 35, 45 – we will be there for you with a hug and a smile, till we are alive. Loads and loads and loads of love! Happy 14th!
P.S. I found writing this note unbelievably hard. There was so much to write, and I kept writing and deleting! And I am sure this one has also come out a bit disjointed, given my mind and memories were scattered all over! Love you!
_______________________________________________________________
This blog post is part of the blog challenge ‘Blogaberry Dazzle’ hosted by Cindy D’Silva and Noor Anand Chawla in collaboration with Bohemian Bibliophile.
Thanks for reading this post. Please like, comment and share!
Regards, Sakshi aka tripleamommy
You can find me at:
Blog: https://tripleamommy.com/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/tripleamommmy
Insta: https://www.instagram.com/tripleamommmy/
FB page: https://www.facebook.com/Tripleamommy-2101887313189940
Pinterest: https://in.pinterest.com/tripleamommmy/
Do consider buying my book “Raising Capable Children” that shares hundreds of tips and ideas on bringing up confident children. See below for buying options.
India – Amazon: https://amzn.to/3j3QSrx ; Flipkart: https://www.flipkart.com/raising-capable-children/p/itm2134c13e7108f?pid=9789390267033
For US and UK- https://www.amazon.com/dp/939026703X ; https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/939026703X
What a beautiful letter to your son! Such a booster for your growing child to have his parent support him like this. Happy Birthday to him.
Awwww, I can feel your mixed emotions. I’m already missing my chubby little 2 year old now that he is going to be 8. But I cannot imagine staying away from him for too long. Happy 14th to your little boy who is always going to be little to you!
Aww, what an encouraging yet adorable letter to your son as a parent. Happy birthday to the little champ! I wish him all success and good health in life. And I could see that he is so lucky to have amazing, supportive parents.
I absolutely loved reading this blog post. It’s filled with so much love and warmth. It’s beautiful to see the special bond between a parent and their child. Wishing your son a very happy 14th birthday filled with love and joy!
Thank you so much!
Beautifully letter to your Son. Happy 14 th birthday to him. I can imagine how difficult is to be a teen mom. My daughter is just 10 year old but slowly started her teenage characteristics. I can feel your emotions. God bless your son.
An absolutely beautiful and heartfelt note by a mother for her first born. May Arnav grow from pillar to post.
Happy 14th Birthday to your gentleman! It’s incredible to think about how fast time flies, isn’t it? I can totally relate as a mom to a teenager – my own just turned 14 this year! Your words about your growing son hit close to home. Cheers to navigating the teenage years together! It’s completely understandable that expressing such emotions can be challenging, I can totally feel you. 😪
Thanks 😊
Awwww… it is so straight from the heart… no wonder you couldn’t stop. It was lovely to read such an encouraging, motivating and positive letter. It says a lot about u as a parent. It must have been hard to send him away but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do.
P.S: Best wishes to Arnav on his 14th bday.
‘Shorty’ is such a cute and endearing term. When I read that it made me go ‘Aww’/ Happy 14th to Arnav. I’m sure he’s going to grow up to make you proud (more than he’s already doing) and achieve amazing things. Because he has learnt hard work and resilience from this woman (his mom) I’ve grown to admire as a blogger. Such a beautiful and heartfelt letter this was.
Thank you so much 😊
Such a heartwarming and endearing letter to your son, celebrating his birthday as a parent. Happy birthday to the little champ! I wish him abundant success and excellent health in life. He’s truly fortunate to have such incredible, supportive parents by his side.
Thanks!
I wish great things to happen to Arnav! Best wishes for his future!!
This open letter to your son brought tears to my eyes, I can feel your profound love and yearning for him. He has such a balanced head on his shoulders for his age! God Bless !!
Thanks so much!
Happiest Birthday to this amazing person!!
I hope he reads this and is content through and through. With every word I read, a smile appeared on my face. It’s beautiful
Thanks 😊. Yes he was very happy to read it.
What a lovely letter or should I say a birthday wish. Many more happy returns to the champion and I wish him all the goodness
Thanks!
Mother’s love is the best and your love for the first child made me so happy. As I am also the first child in my parents. 🤩🤩🤩🤩
Such a beautiful and heartfelt letter this is, Sakshi! As a mother of a 15yo boy I can closely relate to it. Your son is a sorted, matured and happy child. Hope he’s able to fulfill all his dreams and makes you both even more proud of him. God bless!
Thanks so much!
I loved reading this blog. You have filled this with your warmth of emotions and love for your son. This journey as a mother is not easy but full of lovely memories and hurdles that a mother crosses with a smile. Wishing your son a very happy birthday and good health.
Thanks!
Happy birthday to your not so little anymore champ! That’s such a heartfelt letter. I can’t imagine staying away from my kiddos. Your son is lucky to have such supportive parents!
Thanks!
Such a beautiful and heartfelt letter to your son. Children may grow up but they will always be children for us. I enjoyed reading about your journey as a mother through your letter. God bless him.
what a beautiful journey and love filled letter. You son will read and re-read this in the years to come and feel your love. Happy 14TH!
Thanks!
Your journey with your first born is always special. Even at his or her 40th, you are experiencing it for the first time being mum or dad of 40 year old person!
True!
This blog beautifully captures the bittersweet sentiment of watching a firstborn grow up. I am a new mom and get overwhelmed by reading it
It’s a lovely journey!
Aww, this is such a touching post, your words are so genuine. Reading this heartfelt letter brought tears to my eyes. It’s evident how much love and pride you have for Aarav. He’s truly lucky to have you as his mother. Happy 14th birthday to Aarav! May he continue to grow surrounded by your unwavering support and love.
Thanks so much!
First of all, happy birthday to your son! This is a heartfelt letter and i could see the emotional rollercoaster you must’ve gone through while writing this.
Thanks!
I could feel mummy’s love in each word your have written. When it come to expressing your love for your child, you always fell short of words. All the best to your growing kid.. Good bless him always.
Thanks!
How wonderfully written. I have smiles throughout reading this post. My elder is 8 but I just went fast forward with her to the future with your article. How would I feel when she enters into her teens and all
Thanks!
Best wishes to your son and I hope he read it too. From your post It shows that A is mature and intelligent at the same time…what a nice combination to have in a child. Celebrating a birthday when the child is in another place isn’t easy, so lots of hugs to you too. God less A and the twins and your wonderful family.
Thanks so much! Yes he was the first one to read it and allowed me to share it publicly.
What a heartfelt tribute to a fourteen-year-old. What is there for children to feel great in their lives other than how their parents love them? Their mommy is a significant part of his life, and he will stay that way. This is a great post dedicated to motherhood, parenthood and love.
Thanks so much for a heartfelt comment!
Awww I loved this post, it touched my heart as a fellow mom! Congratulations on your oldest turning 14!
Thanks 😊
A touching reflection on celebrating birthdays from a distance. Your personal story and suggestions for virtual celebrations are heartwarming and relatable. Thanks for sharing this heartfelt post!
Thank you Sonia!