This is a guest post written by Charu Mathur Dev. Charu is a freelancer in Hindi writing, editing and translating. Her congenital orthopedic condition did not deter her from continuous upskilling and she did her MPhil and cleared SET and NET while working at the school. She also writes poetry and blogs about library science. In this inspiring post she shares her experience of tackling depression and coming out of it.
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Unexpected challenges are something that life frequently throws at us, and for me, that obstacle was a severe, incapacitating depression, brought on by my congenital condition (read about it here). Friends, today I’m going to tell you how I went from living in the dark and hopeless shadows of depression to discovering healing and hope.
Until recently, Depression and Arthritis were just words that I would use in my articles during the course of my freelancing journey. But soon-after the 2011, within two years of my marriage, these two words became the laughing demons on my medical prescription and led to frequent hospitalisations too.
During one such hospital stay, a doctor advised me to reduce the level of my stress and depression which I outrightly rejected. Not because I did not trusted the doctor, but because I was not ready to admit that I may have been depressed at any time. But soon enough, I realised that he was correct, I was indeed in the grip of depression. I was losing interest in life and all other activities which otherwise used to give me much happiness. Not only this, my body pain and arthritis pain was also increasing day by day. So much so that last year Deepawali and this year Holi, my knees were completely locked. It was totally debilitating and I was completely bedridden. Even going to the bathroom was an agony. These instances were the final warning signals for me – flashing red.
Being conscious of my depressive state of mind
We all know that recognizing the issue is the first step toward recovery from any type of illness. Same fact was proven in my case when I discovered myself in shadows, shrouded in hopelessness. It was not only important to realize that I was depressed, but it wasn’t a simple realization. It took me some time to realize how much my feelings mattered and how much they were affecting my general wellbeing. I realised later, that this was the time when all of my ten fingers were pointed outwards, blaming my near and dear ones for my depressive state of mind. But with the help of meditation, I realised that although blaming others is a typical coping strategy, it traps us in a vicious loop of negativity. I finally faced the fact that I had to be accountable for my own happiness and that real healing starts on the inside.
In order to heal myself, I started deep-breathing regularly and intentionally, even some times, not willingly, but had to do, because I did not want to become a bed-ridden patient at this early age. This technique started turning the wheel in opposite direction.
Taking responsibility for my emotional well-being was a slow journey. It entailed getting expert assistance, being honest with friends and family, and making healthier lifestyle decisions. I was able to unravel the emotional web that had ensnared me for so long by exploring the core causes of my sadness in a safe space that was offered by therapy. Having supportive relationships became essential to my recovery since they provided solace and comprehension in the worst of times.
Now I am Depression-Free
It took me some time, patience, and constant work to get out of the dark side of depression. Although there were obstacles and detours along the road, and the path wasn’t linear, I learned to appreciate little accomplishments. I was able to reclaim joy, purpose, and a refreshed sense of self after escaping the grip of despair.
Able to cure my triggered Arthritis pain
In addition to the difficulties of dealing with melancholy, I also had to deal with induced arthritic pain. My experience was evidence of the robust relationship between mental health and physical well-being that has been suggested by research. The moment I dealt with the underlying source of my despair, my arthritic symptoms significantly subsided.
Conclusion
My path from depression to a life free of depression has taught me the value of being self-aware, accepting accountability for my mental health, and asking for help when I need it. Healing is a process that calls for bravery, tolerance, and a readiness to face one’s inner demons. Should you discover yourself in a comparable circumstance, be aware that assistance and hope are accessible. Keep in mind that the stars shine brightest on the darkest nights, and you possess the inner strength to rise into the light.
This post is a part of “International Day of Persons with Disability” blog hop hosted by Sakshi Varma – Tripleamommy. #IDPD2023Bloghop. Access all posts of this bloghop at Championing Diversity, Uniting Voices: Commemorating IDPD Together
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Regards, Sakshi aka tripleamommy
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